A Knack to Nag

I seem to have an innate, tenacious, and habitual inclination to criticize. 😫

On my hikes, I encounter all sorts of people. Some greet me, some don’t. Some listen to music, others engage in in-depth conversations with me. I see hikers, bikers, and runners. The smorgasbord of moods, activities, and attitudes I encounter is manifold. And just as manifold are the lessons I learn.

One time I ran into a hiker who reprimanded me for going off-trail. It was during the height of COVID, and I tried to give her some space. She lectured me about how going off-trail harms nature because it can lead to erosion. Even though I doubted that briefly stepping off the path could impact the ground to the point of decay, I understood where she was coming from. At the same time, it was important to me to maintain a healthy distance between us, and I explained that to her.

Her priorities, however, lay elsewhere.

“That’s what these are for,” she said, pointing to her face covered by a surgical mask. “Wear one, and you don’t have to get out of the way.”

While I wasn’t necessarily opposed to masks, when outside I preferred giving others space over wearing one. She obviously had a different approach. I figured, neither of us was ready to change our positions, so rather than engaging in further debates, I nodded and went on my way.

Years later, I was relishing a brisk hike on one of my favorite trails when cries of glee caught my attention. I looked up and saw two mountain bikers racing downhill, cheering and shouting joyfully. It was clearly a father and his son. The boy appeared hesitant at first, but encouraged by his dad, he eventually plucked up the courage to dash down the final stretch of the hill.

I smiled, infected by their contagious laughter and the sweet bond they shared. But then my inner critic piped up and spouted unkind comments:

“That is all very well, guys, but you are off-trail and that’s not good for nature. Look at all the erosion around you!”

Fortunately, I was too far away for them to hear me. Because the moment those words shot out of my mouth, I knew it was not about them; it was about me and my need to criticize.

As soon as I realized this, I shook my head and tried to rectify the situation. My approach, however, was rather amusing: I wanted to atone for my critical behavior by continuing to criticize, only this time myself. Yup. I was about to make amends for being critical by criticizing myself for being such a critic. If that isn’t hilariously self-defeating, I don’t know what is! 😂

Brigitte K. Schneider
aka Ms. Knackety Nag

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