Coincidence?

I made a right turn at the traffic light, and the sedan next to me did the same. There was no issue since the intersection had two lanes designated for right turns. However, the driver of the sedan nearly collided with me because he encroached into my lane while making his turn. I had to slam on my brakes and swerve to avoid him, missing him by mere inches and almost hitting the curb. I doubt he even realized what had happened.

Once we completed our turns and he was back in his lane, a pickup truck gunned out of the parking lot from the other side of the street and crossed right in front of us. Both the sedan and I hit the brakes hard.

In those tense moments, I was too focused on avoiding two potential collisions to build up any anger, let alone express it. The driver of the sedan next to me, however, honked vigorously; I could literally hear his fury in the sound of his horn.

After I caught my breath, I couldn’t help but see the humor in all this. The driver who only seconds ago had almost caused an accident by cutting into my lane had just as many skeletons (aka traffic violations 😜) in the closet as the pickup driver he was reprimanding – and yet he felt justified in his anger.

Coincidence?

(I don’t think so; I myself am one of those pots with a tendency to call the kettle black … 🤣.)

As I continued my journey home, a wave of gratitude washed over me. For quite some time, I had been trying to find ways to tame my angry reactions. I’ll admit, it was for selfish reasons. Not only is anger an unpleasant and divisive feeling, but it also limits my ability to respond appropriately. Anger tends to focus on retaliation, not problem-solving. Problem-solving allows me to exert at least some control over my circumstances. And I discovered that humility, gratitude, and compassion are quite helpful in achieving that.

Just as the driver of the sedan didn’t realize the predicament he had put me in, I’m sure I haven’t realized the impact of my actions on others in the past. Similarly, just as I had been alert enough to avoid an accident, others have – metaphorically speaking – picked up the pieces behind me.

I really want to instill this idea of “paying it forward,” so I won’t get all self-righteous and irritated when someone else makes a mistake. As I mentioned, unlike anger, qualities like compassion, gratitude, and humility are not only more agreeable and unifying, but they also enable me to deal with whatever comes my way more effectively. So, when it’s my turn to pick up the pieces after someone else, I’ll hopefully opt for the win-win!

(Fingers crossed, everyone … After all, I’m a work in progress … 😉)

Brigitte K. Schneider
aka Ms. “Honky” Dory

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